Ingredients

  • Subject: And then the fight started........... shopping list
  • My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She shopping list
  • asked, “What's on TV?” shopping list
  • I said, “Dust.” shopping list
  • And then the fight started... shopping list
  • ========== shopping list
  • My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. shopping list
  • She said, “I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 shopping list
  • Seconds.” shopping list
  • I bought her a scale. shopping list
  • And then the fight started... shopping list
  • ========= shopping list
  • When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace shopping list
  • expensive... So, I took her to a gas station... shopping list
  • And then the fight started.... shopping list
  • ========= shopping list
  • After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social shopping list
  • Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and Come back later. The woman said, “Unbutton your shirt”. So I opened my shirt revealing My curly silver hair. She said, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me” and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. shopping list
  • She said, “you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten Disability, too.” shopping list
  • And then the fight started... shopping list
  • ========= shopping list
  • My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I shopping list
  • kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, “Do you know her?” shopping list
  • “Yes,” I sighed, “She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.” shopping list
  • ''My God!” says my wife, “who would think a person could go on Celebrating that long?” shopping list
  • And then the fight started... shopping list
  • ========= shopping list
  • I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road. shopping list
  • Slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get so stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, shopping list
  • Looked up at me, and shouted, “I AM NOT HAPPY!” shopping list
  • So, I looked down at him and said, “Well, then which one are you?” shopping list
  • And then the fight started... shopping list
  • ========== shopping list
  • THE BROKEN LAWN MOWER shopping list
  • When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, playing golf . Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, shopping list
  • busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, ' When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.' shopping list
  • The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp. shopping list
  • Enjoy. JJ shopping list

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Reviews & Comments 16

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    " It was excellent "
    nadaism ate it and said...
    Cheerfully hehehehehe :):):):):)5

    ~ Nada ~
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    " It was excellent "
    wttothemax ate it and said...
    I never thought I would use this term, but LMAO!
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  • sitbynellie 17 years ago
    Hilarious. Will be passing this around among my pals.
    Love Nellie (Susan)
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    " It was excellent "
    leroux ate it and said...
    Lol!Lol! Totally loved it! Had to copy it for my dad!
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    juels ate it and said...
    I was laughing too! Thanks again for keeping us entertained, JJ!
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    brianna ate it and said...
    What a great way to start Sunday morning. I laughed all the way through. Thankyou for the smiles. 55555+++++
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    lunasea ate it and said...
    Oh JJ....those are great!! Wheeeee.....thanks for the giggles this morning. ;)
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    chihuahua ate it and said...
    My friend I must tell you three things happened as I read your story. First, the tears welled up. Don't worry, they were happy ones. I too have been married a long time and your tale struck a cord. Second, I smilled all the way through. Third, you made me laugh and I was greatly entertained.

    Wish I could give you a hug. Will you accept a virtual one?

    Chichi
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    " It was excellent "
    dragonwings647 ate it and said...
    Thanks for the laughs. Laughter is good for the soul and the body. Thanks
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  • ttaaccoo 17 years ago
    very good!! needed those funnies right now! thanx!!
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    momo_55grandma ate it and said...
    love this one and the fight started Lol what a hoot good one deserves a good rate
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    " It was excellent "
    notyourmomma ate it and said...
    Love this. How funny! I really needed a good laugh, thank you.
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    jett2whit ate it and said...
    oh my! funny
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
  • emie73 17 years ago
    i'm thingking before maybe recipes for kids like popcorn..he he..saturday humor..
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  • emie73 17 years ago
    ah, what a nice recipe! he he.."5fork" for my boss..
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag
    " It was excellent "
    mjcmcook ate it and said...
    ~Hello~jj~
    "Always good to see a 'Foodie' with
    a 'sense-of-humor'"~ (^_^) ~
    ~*~ mj ~*~
    "Make that ~ "5"FORK!!!!! Humor"~
    Was this review helpful? Yes Flag

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